Home Orthopedics Dealing with anxiety. Increased anxiety: causes and ways to cope with it

Dealing with anxiety. Increased anxiety: causes and ways to cope with it

Surely you are familiar with a similar state: everything seems to be fine, there is no reason to worry, but you feel anxiety coming from nowhere. Getting stronger and stronger, it resembles panic, and you can no longer control yourself, things fall out of your hands, thoughts about work do not enter your head, you are nervous and as if you are waiting for something bad to happen. Suddenly, anxiety turns into fear, and you cannot explain what exactly you are afraid of. If this has happened to you, don’t worry: it’s completely normal, and there are a lot of people around you who periodically experience the same thing.

Of course, you shouldn’t completely get rid of emotions such as anxiety and fear, and it won’t work. They are the ones who are called upon to protect us from possible threats, thanks to them we “do not fall apart” in difficult situation, we mobilize all our strength, begin to think faster and look for ways to solve the problem. If there is a reason for anxiety, then it does not baffle us, it only helps us gather our will into a fist and move on, which cannot be said about anxiety out of nowhere. This feeling can become truly destructive. Feeling fear, a person automatically looks for something that scares him, but if he doesn’t find it, he begins to fear even more. It seems to him that he has fallen into a trap: anxiety is growing, but he cannot get rid of its cause, and therefore the nervousness itself. He feels helpless and exhausted, and cannot concentrate on his usual activities. It is not surprising that some people experience real panic attacks: at such moments they cannot control themselves, they feel dizzy, their palms sweat, shortness of breath and nausea appear, and their heart rate increases. If you don’t want to experience something like this, then our advice will be useful to you. So, how to deal with causeless anxiety?

Try to find a reason

No matter how paradoxical it may sound, even causeless anxiety has its own reason. You may not be able to immediately come up with the correct answer, but make an effort to understand at what point you began to experience anxiety from nowhere. Maybe this happened during a conversation with your boss, when he casually mentioned a task that he gave you a long time ago and which you just can’t complete? Listen to yourself and your feelings, mentally “run through” all areas of your life: is everything okay in the family, with your parents, in your relationships with friends and at work? Have you heard some unpleasant and frightening news on TV this morning? Whatever it is, try to understand the reasons for your nervousness. You will see, you will immediately feel better.

“Run” mentally through all areas of your life: is everything okay in your family, with your parents, in your relationships with friends and at work?

Voice it out

If alone you cannot understand the reasons anxiety state, then talk to someone who is close to you and understands you perfectly. This could be a mother, sister or friend, the main thing is that your “psychotherapist” does not fall into a stupor from the phrase: “I’m afraid of something and I don’t know what.” If there is such a person in your environment, then feel free to dial his number and calmly explain that you feel causeless anxiety. In fact, this method does not exist for someone to “brainwash” you, everything is much simpler: by talking to a person who will tell you: “Everything is fine, don’t worry,” and then distract you from dark thoughts by telling a couple interesting stories, you yourself will not notice how you will calm down and forget about your anxiety.

Take a break

Wherever the feeling of unreasonable fear finds you, try to do everything so as not to be alone with your thoughts: if you are at home, then turn on an interesting film, preferably a comedy, immerse yourself in a book, invite a close friend for a visit or for a walk, and if anxiety has hit you at work, then change the book to important documents that require extreme concentration, or, conversely, invite your colleagues to the table with tea and cookies.

A warm, relaxing bath with lavender oil is a great way to relieve anxiety.

Exhale

And then inhale, and then exhale again. Do this exercise several times, let each breath be deep, just like this breathing exercises can help in the fight against causeless anxiety and fear. In addition, a warm, relaxing bath with lavender oil can help relieve anxiety. This plant is known for the fact that it easily calms even an overly “raging” nervous system. And after your bath, drink mint tea or warm milk. After these procedures, you will fall asleep like a baby, and in the morning there will be no trace of anxiety.

Contact a specialist

If you have honestly tried to cope with causeless anxiety on your own, but nothing works for you, and attacks are repeated with enviable consistency, then it’s time to turn to a specialist. Tell a psychotherapist about your problem, he will help you find out the reasons for your growing anxiety, and will also develop a personal program for combating anxiety for you. If necessary, your doctor can prescribe the medications you need.

Today we will talk about what anxiety is and how to cope with it. If you often feel psychological discomfort, uncertainty about the future and your strengths, mood swings, and anxiety, then you are probably faced with anxiety. But without correcting the condition, it can turn into anxiety. "What is the difference?" - you ask. Read on.

Anxiety is a stable personality quality, while anxiety is a temporary state (emotion). If traumatic situations are repeated frequently, negative factors influence constantly, then uncertainty and anxiety become permanent, which significantly worsens the quality of life. Anxiety can be corrected and measured. But as always, first things first.

Description of the phenomenon

The specifics of anxiety depend on age. Its occurrence is based on dissatisfaction with the actual needs of the individual, which also differ from the age and worldview of the person.

For example, for an early age, the leading need is communication with the mother. For preschoolers – the need for independence. For primary school children - the need to be significant. For teenagers - engage in socially significant activities and, according to other experts, interpersonal communication with peers. For young men in the future – professional and personal self-realization.

Thus, the object of anxiety may differ depending on age. So, for example, if in early age the child finds it difficult to bear separation from his mother, then primary school Anxiety can be triggered by academic failure, and in adolescence, by rejection by the class. However, the needs for food, safety, and sleep remain relevant for everyone.

In response to anxiety, defense and compensation mechanisms are always activated. Anxiety left to chance provokes the development of states of panic and despair. It destroys personality.

By tradition, I want to outline a few key facts that will better convey to you the essence of the phenomenon:

  1. Anxiety is a reaction to fear (real or potential), a situation that is dangerous for the individual (in his understanding).
  2. Anxiety is a sign of personal distress and internal discord.
  3. Anxiety is accompanied by increased concentration and excessive motor activity.
  4. Anxiety can be situational (emotion) and personal (quality).
  5. People with mental and somatic disorders, behavioral or developmental disorders are more susceptible to anxiety; have experienced a psychologically traumatic situation.
  6. If it is normal to feel anxious sometimes, then you need to fight anxiety.
  7. If the object is clearly known (darkness, loneliness), then this is fear. Anxiety does not have clear boundaries, although it is closely related to the first definition.
  8. Manifestations of anxiety are ambiguous, reactions are individual.
  9. There is a concept of useful anxiety. This is the level necessary for personal development. We are talking, for example, about an attack on the values ​​of an individual, without which he will not be a person in his own mind. That is, to put it exaggeratedly, it will stop living and begin to exist. Normal and useful anxiety arises in response to a real threat, is not a form of suppressing internal conflict, does not cause a defensive reaction, and can be eliminated by arbitrarily changing the situation or one’s attitude towards it.

It is worth noting that anxiety can only be a motivator in adolescence and older. Before this, it can only have a destructive, disorganizing effect. At the same time, before adolescence, anxiety is more of a situational nature (for example, fear of getting a bad mark on a test), and starting from puberty it is more personal. That is, anxiety does not become a personality trait until adolescence. If we talk about what is easier to correct, then, of course, situational anxiety.

At the level of neural processes in the brain, anxiety is the simultaneous activation of the ergotropic and trophotropic systems, that is, the simultaneous work of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system. The body simultaneously receives opposite reactions, for example, an increase in heart rate (sympathetic) and a slowdown (parasympathetic). Wherein sympathetic system still somewhat dominant. What causes the phenomena:

  • hyperreactivity;
  • anxiety;
  • salivation and so on.

Features of the behavior of a highly anxious person

The person himself is not always aware of the problem, and it is difficult to notice anxiety from the outside. Especially if it is masked, compensated or turned on defense mechanism. However, there are several characteristic differences anxious person:

  1. Excessively emotional reactions to failures.
  2. Decreased performance in stressful situations or under tight deadlines.
  3. Fear of failure prevailing over the desire for success.
  4. A situation of success serves as an incentive and motivation for activity, a situation of failure “kills”.
  5. The perception of the entire surrounding world or many objects as dangerous, although subjectively this is not so.

Low-anxious individuals have the opposite characteristics. For example, situations of failure serve as a greater motivator for them than success. However, low anxiety back side medals, it is also dangerous to the individual.

More obvious reactions of the body are somatic signs. With a high level of anxiety the following are noted:

  • skin abnormalities (itching, rash);
  • job change of cardio-vascular system(hypertension, tachycardia);
  • violations respiratory function(shortness of breath, asphyxia);
  • dyspeptic disorders (diarrhea, heartburn, flatulence, constipation, dry mouth);
  • genital-urinal reactions (cycle disturbances in women, impotence in men, frequent urination, pain);
  • vasomotor phenomena (sweating);
  • problems of the musculoskeletal system (pain, lack of coordination, stiffness).

An anxious person tends to be professional and emotional burnout, a more pronounced awareness of traumatic factors and dangers (for example, the profession of a surgeon); not satisfied with oneself, life, profession; feels hopeless, “cornered”, “caged”; depressed

Causes of anxiety

Anxiety often begins in childhood. TO possible factors that provoke this phenomenon include:

  • inconsistency of the positions of parents, parents and teachers, management at work, one’s own attitudes and actions (the result in each case is intrapersonal conflict);
  • inflated expectations (setting the bar too high for oneself or excessively demanding parents, for example, the popular “study excellently”);
  • situations of dependence and humiliation (“If you tell me who broke the window, then I will forgive you for missing school and won’t tell my parents anything”);
  • deprivation, failure to meet current needs;
  • awareness of the discrepancy between opportunities and abilities;
  • social, financial or professional instability, instability.

Types of anxiety

Each body reacts differently to constant anxiety. Based on this, several types of anxiety can be distinguished:

  1. Conscious uncontrollable. Disorganizes a person's life.
  2. Conscious, controlled and compensated. Serves as an incentive to perform activities. But often this only works in familiar situations.
  3. Conscious cultivated anxiety. A person takes advantage of his position and seeks benefits, often talking about manipulation.
  4. Unconscious hidden. Ignored or denied by the individual, it can be manifested by individual motor actions (for example, curling hair).
  5. Unconscious compensatory-protective. A person tries to convince himself that everything is fine. "I'm fine! I do not need help!"
  6. Avoiding situations of anxiety. If anxiety is all-encompassing, then often such withdrawal is immersion in a virtual network or addictions, subcultures, that is, withdrawal from reality.

School anxiety, ways to deal with childhood anxiety

School anxiety is common during basic education. It may occur against the background of:

  • incorrectly designed or decorated educational environment (rooms, zones, objects);
  • dysfunctional relationships with classmates, teachers or other participants in the educational process;
  • heavy loads within educational program, high requirements, frequent exams, rating-point system;
  • arising from the previous factor of lack of energy and time;
  • incorrect behavior of parents (destructive parenting style, high or low expectations and demands);
  • school changes.

In adolescence (middle and high school age), failures in social interactions(peers, teachers, parents). In younger children school age– problems in educational activities.

Correction of anxiety (both school and situational and personal) in children involves several directions:

  1. Parent education. The goal of the work is to improve their psychological and pedagogical literacy. It is important to understand the role of the influence of parenting style on anxiety, which refers to the nature of demands and expectations. Secondly, parents need to understand the influence of their emotional state on the child's emotions. The third component is the parents' faith in the child.
  2. Education and, if necessary, correction of the teacher’s behavior (the same is true for parents when homeschooling). It is necessary to avoid public punishments, not to focus on mistakes as something terrible (one learns from mistakes, they are useful and necessary). As in the first point, do not convey your anxiety, do not “pour” garbage and problems onto the child. Interact with parents. Conduct reflection on actions.
  3. Working with the children themselves. Creating situations of success, working through mistakes and situations, discussing exciting topics.

Diagnosis of anxiety

  1. For diagnosing adults, I would like to recommend the Spielberger questionnaire. The technique, in my opinion, allows us to understand the nature of anxiety as accurately as possible. You answer 40 judgments (“yes” or “no”, how true it is for you), and as a result you get a clearly measured level of personal and situational anxiety. At a high level, it is recommended to work on increasing confidence in one’s own success; at a low level, it is recommended to work on activity and motivation.
  2. Define school anxiety using the Phillips questionnaire. This is an extensive diagnosis that identifies factors (causes) of anxiety, which is very important for further work. The child responds to the statements of the method (how true they are in relation to him), then the results are interpreted according to the “key”. The technique allows you to determine general anxiety, the experience of social stress at the moment, worries about an unsatisfied need for success, fear of self-expression, fear of knowledge testing situations, fear of not meeting the expectations of others, low level physical capabilities resist stress, problems in relationships with the teacher.

Anxiety correction

In the fight against anxiety, it is important to take into account its nature (disorganizer or motivator), causes and type. At the same time, the characteristics of the individual and the capabilities of his environment play an important role.

Dealing with anxiety on your own is difficult. Even when a specialist works with a client, a wall of resistance and psychological barriers often arise. Even if the client wants to get rid of anxiety, he still often resists. The desire to help is perceived as an attack on security and the comfort zone, which, despite the name, means “familiar zone.” In this case, familiar does not mean comfortable.

Anxiety is closely related to shyness and withdrawal. Usually the latter arise against the background of the first phenomenon. However, the opposite also happens.

Thus, to reduce the level of anxiety, you need to work on self-confidence, the formation of adequate self-esteem, and getting rid of shyness. If you, dear reader, are forced to struggle with anxiety yourself, here are some general tips for you:

  1. Don't worry about what didn't happen.
  2. Cultivate in yourself an orientation toward compromise, cooperation, and mutual assistance.
  3. Take care of your psychophysical state. For example, make it a rule to do morning exercises, not stay late at work, learn to say “no” or, on the contrary, help.
  4. Love yourself. Don't be afraid to create comfortable conditions for yourself.
  5. Improve your communication skills, learn how to communicate and how to resolve conflicts.
  6. Learn self-regulation. A trivial example is to count to yourself to 10.
  7. Never isolate yourself.
  8. Find an outlet. Every person and even animal should have their own place of safety and pleasure. You need to know that no matter what you have this place (hobby, people). And even if everything “collapses” around you, there you will find peace and support.
  9. Understand what your anxiety consists of. Usually this is a complex of emotions, among which fear is a constant component. Variants such as “fear, shame and guilt” or “fear, guilt and anger” may appear.

Please remember main principle anxiety. The more you worry, the more the quality of your activities suffers. This leads to even more anxiety. Yes, it's a vicious circle. It literally needs to be torn apart.

Within psychological correction anxiety important role is given to self-regulation. The following methods are effective:

  • switching (“it will be tomorrow, but today I won’t think about it and read this book”);
  • distraction (detachment from a disturbing factor through willpower);
  • decrease in significance (“This is just a report. Yes, it is of a public nature, but I am confident in my abilities, I can explain every phrase and figure. This is just a story about the work done. The same as there have already been many on paper”);
  • thinking through plan B (you cannot deviate from the goal, as they say, “there are 33 letters in the alphabet, which means you have 33 plans”);
  • making additional inquiries (you were given an unfamiliar address - find it on the map, look at street visualizations, find landmarks);
  • physical warm-up (sport relieves stress and fatigue, relaxes the brain, increases its activity, promotes the development of new ideas and fresh views on the situation);
  • temporary deferment of the goal with modernization of the plan for achieving it, that is, the inclusion of new stages (for example, taking advanced training courses);
  • replaying previous situations of success and self-pride or simply positive pleasant moments.

Well, and finally one more thing. Look at anxiety as a pointless waste of time, energy and imagination. If you want to invent, write, draw, compose. Or come up with a new activity for yourself.

Try to write down on a sheet of anxiety that you experienced at least six months ago. You probably won't remember. Or write down your current worries and read them a month later. Most likely, none of them will come true, and then you will understand that your thoughts were in vain.

There is no point in worrying, you need to solve problems or change your attitude. Tooth hurts - cure, remove, snowing– wear warm shoes.

Results

Anxiety determines individual behavior. Most dangerous consequence– the phenomenon of learned helplessness. That is, a person’s clear conviction of his own inadequacy (“I won’t succeed, and there’s no point in trying,” “I won’t be able to become an announcer, because I can’t even read well”). Personal and professional life suffers from this; a person cannot fully enter society and establish an independent life.

They strive to put their lives in someone else's hands and go with the flow. Often such people live with their parents or find someone for “symbiosis”. It’s even worse when they take the role of a victim and tolerate a tyrant next to them, for example, in the form of a spouse. Neuroses often also develop against a background of anxiety.

The main weapon in the fight against anxiety is self-awareness, that is, self-concept. This is a person's idea of ​​himself. Thus, to get rid of anxiety you need to work on yourself. Self-concept includes cognitive, evaluative and behavioral components. You need to work on everything that has an element of “itself”:

  • self-esteem,
  • self-confidence,
  • self-control
  • self-regulation,
  • self-leadership,
  • self-acceptance,
  • self-criticism,
  • self-worth.

Thus, we are talking about personal growth and finding the meaning of life, identifying oneself and one’s place in society.

An uncertain and undecided person is more susceptible to anxiety. And she, in turn, destroys the “self” even more. To get rid of anxiety you need to live, not exist. Be a unique person with clear beliefs, plans, guidelines. Thus, you need to work on your worldview, write down your life plans (for a month, a year, five years, ten). Don’t think about whether it will work out or not, what will happen. Just act, being confident in your strengths and capabilities (of course, plans and goals must be realistic). Difficulties will always arise; there is no perfect moment. But by appealing to your strengths, all barriers can be overcome.

Thank you for attention! Good luck. I believe in you!

Anxiety is the most frequently presented experience of a client with whom a psychologist encounters in the counseling process.

The term “anxiety” is used to describe an emotional state that is characterized by subjective feelings of uneasiness, gloomy forebodings associated with an uncertain, unknown danger. At the psychological level, anxiety can manifest itself as a feeling of helplessness, self-doubt, powerlessness in front of external factors(Prikhozhan A.M., 2009).

At the physiological level, anxiety manifests itself in changes in breathing, increased blood pressure, in an increase in general excitability, in specific sensations in the chest, in sweating, in a rapid heartbeat. External signs Anxieties are fussiness, motor restlessness, tense facial expressions.

There are situational anxiety, which characterizes the individual’s state in this moment, and anxiety as a personality trait (anxiety) - an increased tendency to experience anxiety about real or imaginary dangers (Khanin Yu.L., 1980; Sarason I.G., 1972; Spielberger Ch., 1966).

In the Gestalt approach, anxiety is identical to “arousal” and includes both physiological arousal and undifferentiated emotions. The founder of Gestalt therapy, F. Perls, believes: “... the formula for anxiety is very simple: anxiety is the gap between now and then” (F. Perls, 1994). At the same time, F. Perls considers anxiety and fear from the point of view of the attitude towards external and internal threats and considers anxiety as initially a purely physiological reaction (Perls F., 1995).

From the point of view of Gestalt therapy, anxiety occurs when there is an imbalance in the person-environment system. A constant state of anxiety indicates blocked feelings and desires that are not allowed to be realized.

In Gestalt therapy, anxiety, before being “remade,” must be recognized and appropriated, and not “consoled” and thereby expelled from the field of awareness. In reality, the main strategy for dealing with anxiety is to “cultivate” it in order to realize it and return it to a state of excitement (Lebedeva N.M., Ivanova E.A., 2004). Questions and suggestions can help with this: “Who is your anxiety addressed to?”, “What is your anxiety doing to you?”, “Become your anxiety and express yourself.”

In a therapeutic session, anxiety “signals” about unfinished situations. However, it is not necessarily realized and expressed by the client; it can be hidden behind stereotypical forms of behavior that contribute to the avoidance of awareness. The therapist’s task is to identify and mobilize anxiety (Nemirinsky O.V., 1998).

The appearance of anxiety in the client is a sign of a neurotic interruption of contact. Understanding anxiety as interrupted arousal suggests that it is precisely those layers of experience that cause anxiety that should be the focus of the therapeutic interaction.

From the point of view of Gestalt therapy, a person can regulate his balance with the environment in different ways when faced with obstacles to meeting his needs. The first method is a creative device that allows you to find such an option for contact with outside world, which will allow you to satisfy your needs, as well as maintain harmony both with the outside world and with yourself. In addition, Gestalt therapy identifies the following neurotic mechanisms, or types of resistance (breakdowns in the contact cycle), that prevent a person from achieving psychological health and maturity: fusion (confluence), introjection, projection, retroflection (Perls F., Goodman P., Hefferlin F., 1951), egotism (Goodman P., 2001), deflection (Polsters I. and M., 1997).

Confluence (fusion) is the non-distinction of the boundary between two phenomena: perception and the perceived object, two people, i.e. there is no awareness of the difference between them.

Introjection is the process of assimilating ideas or ways of behavior that are alien to the body under the influence of authorities, the process of accepting concepts on faith when merging with these authorities.

Retroflection of behavior is doing to oneself what a person originally did to other people or objects, tried or wanted to do.

The personality trait of a neurotic or his feeling, behavior, which he does not feel as his own, but is attributed to something or someone in external environment, there is a projection.

Deflexion is a way for the body to avoid direct contact with the environment by constantly changing the direction of movement towards the object of its need until the energy of the initial impulse disappears.

Anxiety appears precisely where contact is avoided. Therefore, during the session, a Gestalt therapist can identify which stage of the contact cycle is associated with the experience of anxiety (Zakharova T.A., 2008). The phase of the contact cycle in which anxiety appears indicates the client's characteristic mechanism for interrupting contact.

With each type of neurotic contact, anxiety is observed, but it differs in the reason for its occurrence and appears when the client is faced with an experience blocked by defense. Types of neurotic self-regulation of the individual have differences in the manifestation of the phenomenon of anxiety. An experimental study conducted in a rehabilitation center for social medicine made it possible to identify a number of relationships between manifestations of the phenomenon of anxiety and neurotic methods of self-regulation of the individual. For most neurotic types of defenses, it was possible to identify the presence of a relationship between certain types anxiety presented and blocked by (unconscious) experience. A study of the dynamics of anxious experience showed that types of neurotic regulation differ in terms of strength, frequency of occurrence and duration of anxiety.

Thus, unmotivated anxiety and getting stuck in unreacted experiences are associated with the confluent type of contact. During fusion, any highlighting of the figure of need causes anxiety. Anxiety arises when meeting one's own personal boundary. The blocked experiences during confluence are joy, interest and surprise, and the energy of anxiety is discharged through the presentation of neurotic experiences of guilt, contempt, disgust and anger.

With introjection, anxiety appears when the world around begins to change. Anxiety replaces the experience of desire, and the next phase of the contact cycle does not occur—the mobilization phase. The blocked experiences during introjection are anger, guilt, disgust, and shame.

In projection, anxiety is caused by the very experience of a feeling. Difficulties arise in awareness, because the energy of anxiety is immediately discharged by aggression. The blocked experience during projection is contempt, and the energy of anxiety is discharged through anger.

With retroflection, anxiety is caused by an action addressed to another person as an object of need (for example, a demand or request). The blocked experience is interest; the energy of anxiety is discharged through shame and disgust.

With deflexion, a person is disturbed by direct contact with other people, receiving feedback, sharing feelings with them. Anxiety appears when approaching an object, the blocked experience is surprise, and the energy of anxiety is discharged through contempt, disgust, and anger.

The egotist experiences the loss of control as anxiety. With egotism, anxiety is caused by a weakening of voluntariness, the blocked experience is joy, and the energy of anxiety is discharged through guilt and fear.

In Gestalt therapy, situational anxiety is dealt with as required by the phase of the contact cycle, where anxiety is followed by a breakdown: resistance is frustrated, preventing the client from wasting excitement.

An alarm can be registered at any moment of the change of figure and ground in the contact cycle. Observing signs of anxiety and their reduction makes the perception of resistance clearer. This helps the therapist to navigate what is happening, to make a choice of what to work with at the moment (Lebedeva N.M., Ivanova E.A., 2004).

The strategies for working with anxiety as a Gestalt therapist are based on the understanding of the need to restore integrity to a person, that is, to help unite oneself and one’s energy.

A Gestalt therapist conducts experiments in which a subject can “connect” or enter into a relationship with his own anxiety (Bulyubash I.D., 2004). For example, the client may be asked to identify with anxiety, that is, to depict a shaking figure, to intensify the type of movement, to realize what needs and feelings are behind this movement (Petrova E., Matkov V., 2008). A person can enter into dialogue with the anxiety or the figure that symbolizes it in order to clarify the feelings and needs of the current moment. The Gestalt therapist may invite the client to describe his feelings, focusing on bodily experiences. The task is to help a person understand what is most suitable at the moment. For example, get angry at someone (experience anger) or find out who or what the client is afraid of (intensify the experience of fear). In general, all these experiments are aimed at increasing attention to yourself and your own needs at the moment.

In Gestalt therapy, anxiety is also considered as a phenomenon of the therapeutic relationship. The therapist can pay attention to the context of the actual therapeutic relationship in which anxiety arises.

How personal characteristic, anxiety is part of self-image. Changing character traits in any case requires very long work and occurs rather involuntarily, in the context of other changes. Strategically, in Gestalt therapy it is proposed to experiment with behavior that is opposite to the main structure of defenses (Lebedeva N.M., Ivanova E.A., 2004).

Thus, the very fact of the presence of anxiety in the Gestalt approach is understood as a phenomenon indicating the presence of blocked energy, which can be returned to the body by special methods.


In life, each of us encounters a feeling of anxiety. Literally from birth, we experience discomfort when encountering something we don’t know, are afraid of, or cannot influence. However, for some, this is a short-term, quickly passing and not very pronounced condition, which a person can easily and independently cope with.

But for some it is a very painful experience that poisons life. It acts as a constant background, interfering with normal life activities, or covers like a ninth wave, completely blocking the ability to rejoice, dream, feel confidence, calmness, harmony and generally do something. Therefore, it is very important to understand what kind of animal this is, when and why it comes to us, and how it can be tamed.

Understanding what is happening gives us, at a minimum, the opportunity to choose: what to do about it and how to behave.

Anxiety is often induced and reinforced by various kinds of fears.

Contributes to the formation of increased anxiety various factors: besides personal characteristics of a person(including him mental characteristics, physiology and personal experience), it's the same family heritage,negative picture of the world And negative self-image.

Family Legacy

When talking about “legacy,” it is worth considering family history and experience of difficult crisis moments in the family’s life, as well as the inherited way of reacting and dealing with anxiety.

1) Every family has its own history, its own myths and skeletons in the closet - stories that people don’t like to talk about, but are remembered and worried about.
If in the life of the family there were missing people, those who were repressed and executed, about whom they could not get information for years and hid this fact for a long time, fearing for their lives, if accidents happened (“I went for bread, got hit by a car,” “lay down on planned surgery and died”, “choked and died”), it is natural to assume that the anxiety there is higher, at least in relation to what caused the death or the worries of relatives.

Often the “heirs” are persecuted fear of something terrible (sudden death close, tragedy), which basically has fear of death. It happens that it is not customary to talk about death in a family, and children are not explained what is happening. Nevertheless, the child feels the atmosphere, tries to compare the facts available to him and conjecture what is being kept silent. Often it is in childhood fantasies on the topic of death are lived out and a certain attitude towards it is born.

It is very traumatic for a child to be present at a suicide or death, when adults behave inappropriately, do not pay attention to the child, leaving him alone with his fantasies and fears, do not console him or explain what happened. The child may feel guilty or associate logical chain some completely unrelated events and in adult life they are afraid of even a hint of coincidence.

For example, in one family there were a number of deaths over a short period of time. They were afraid to injure the child and generally avoided this topic. For the girl, from the information available to her, the following sequence developed: fell ill - called a doctor - disappeared. He fell ill, called a doctor, and disappeared. Is it any wonder that when the mother fell ill and a doctor appeared in their house, the child became hysterical, the girl refused to go to school and let her mother out of sight. In the pictures in different types the fear of something terrible was displayed (like the fear of death).

2) With an unwanted pregnancy (the mother’s thoughts about an abortion), expecting a child of the opposite sex, rejecting parents, when the child did not feel loved and needed, when basic safety needs were not met and there were many reasons to worry, latent depression is possible in adulthood due to a constant poisoned feeling of joy in a prosperous life.

3) There are families with a reduced threshold of anxiety, so-called low-differentiated families. Where it is customary to worry even about minor reasons. Whether it's the inability to get through the first time, a slight delay from work or school, an upcoming trip, or any small change in the family's life.

When terrible pictures of what happened or the future are drawn, the whole family rises to their feet, no one can either calm down themselves or calm down others; everyone's anxiety grows, unites and becomes common. This often happens in codependent relationships.

Growing up in such a family, a child adopts behavioral skills of communication and responding to certain situations and reproduces them in his adult life. For adults who come from such families, it is often characteristic unreasonable fear of the future or fear of the unexpected which may basically have fear of losing control.

How to cope with anxiety with “burdened heredity”:

1. It is often helpful to know your family history. A skeleton in a closet that has seen the light of day ceases to be a skeleton.

To do this, you can ask the older generation what they were afraid of, what influenced it, and how they dealt with their anxiety. I am sure you will recognize many situations similar to yours and will be able to find those whose example will inspire you and give you hope.

You may also suddenly discover where your anxiety comes from. And that it is not yours, but was inherited from your mother or grandmother. Who, with their “parting words” and “testaments” (“do this”, “never behave like that, otherwise it will be worse”) actually admonished you to fear what they themselves were afraid of. But what scared them is not the fact that it will scare you. Therefore, it is worth reconsidering their worries, learning to distinguish between their worries and yours, and returning to them what is not yours and does not suit you.

2. If you are tormented constant feeling If you are depressed and nothing in this life makes you happy, it is better to take the Beck test, which allows you to determine whether you have depression. If your fears are confirmed, do not lose heart. It is important to seek advice from a psychiatrist, as he is competent to prescribe medication maintenance therapy. Unfortunately, you can’t do without it in case of depression. Now there are many different gentle schemes. And later, with a psychologist or psychotherapist, work through the reasons that caused this condition and find resources to cope with it.

3. If you come from a family where there is a lot of anxiety, it is worth writing out the situations where the anxiety is most severe and observing other people or families to see how you can behave differently in these circumstances. This is how you can learn alternative ways handling anxiety and expanding the stock of behavioral skills. That is, become more adaptive.

You can also keep an “anxious” diary, in which, as soon as you feel the onset of anxiety, write down in detail your feelings, the place where you are, the events that preceded it, the duration of the sensations, possible reasons, the people who surround you, and also rate on a scale from 0 to 10 the strength of the severity of your experiences. This will give an understanding of how often, how strongly and under what circumstances it occurs. this state.

Negative picture of the world

There may be several reasons for the formation of a negative picture of the world. This is an insecure type of attachment in childhood (anxious, avoidant, or a combination of both), rejecting parents and a certain style of raising and treating the child, when close adults not only did not provide protection and safety, but also resorted to physical punishment and other forms of violence.

At the same time, the world is perceived as unsafe and full of challenges. There is no trust in him. This often happens because the child (especially younger age) gets used to dealing with things on his own different situations without receiving the necessary support and consolation. When there is no reliable, loving, emotionally involved adult nearby (for example, a child is often left alone for a long time, or an adult is physically nearby, but is emotionally unavailable, for example, when a mother is depressed) or an adult is nearby, but responds inadequately to the child’s needs (when the baby wants to sleep, they play with him; when his stomach hurts, he is fed, etc.)

Anxiety is also noted in those who felt unsafe in childhood and for whom their parents did not stand up. Providing protection and security is mainly a dad's function. That is why strict upbringing with a strict regime, as well as frequent use physical punishment for the slightest offense (especially when a father hits his daughter) has far-reaching consequences. And it’s not even about difficult relationships with the opposite sex.·

How to cope with anxiety with a negative picture of the world?

1. You need to learn to focus on positive events.

In therapy, I call this “turning the spotlight from the usual negativity to the positive.” It is important not only to limit what worries and upsets, but also to learn to see the good around.

So, it is important to reduce your viewing of news programs (according to statistics, out of 10 news stories, 7-8, if not more, are negative, you can check), limit communication with “toxic” people (those who constantly complain, criticize you, compare, devalue; after communication with whom you feel tired, irritated or empty), reduce the time of contact with what you don’t like.

In contrast, at the end of the day before going to bed, list what was good during the day, even if it was something very small and fleeting. Make it a habit.

2. It’s worth analyzing what makes you happy and what upsets you.

Divide the sheet into two parts and write at least 10 points in both columns. Find time during the day and complete at least one item from the “pleasant” column. Think about how to deal less with negative events.

3. To create and strengthen a calm inner feeling, auto-training, yoga, meditation, relaxation techniques and breathing techniques help.

4. If there was no secure attachment with your parents (you are used to relying only on yourself) and various reasons If it is impossible now, then you can look as an adult for those who could provide you with support, acceptance, comfort and understanding. Among colleagues, girlfriends, teachers, distant relatives, acquaintances. You need to find a person whom you can trust, communication with whom is clear and comfortable. In some cases, this person may be a psychologist.

5. Become your own parent: grow your own inner parent, learn to calm and take care of your own inner child on one's own. To do this, ask yourself (your child): “What do you want? How can I console you? This could be a walk, chatting with friends, a book at night, a bubble bath, a movie, a game, a hobby (designing, drawing, knitting, singing, playing an instrument, jogging, cooking, etc.)

6. Learn to protect yourself. Various training in dealing with aggression and anger or playing sports (boxing, self-defense techniques, any ball games) will help here. In personal therapy, it is important to work through your relationship with your parents if there has been violence in the family or if you have experiences where you were unable to protect yourself with other people.

As we learn to protect ourselves and our boundaries, we become more confident and the world around us no longer seems so scary and anxiety-inducing.

Negative self-image

The self-image is formed through interaction with significant others. That is why those who criticize, compare, evaluate, overprotect, as well as parents with high expectations or inflated demands, doom their child to imagine himself as “bad”, “not good enough”, “can’t cope”, “loser”, “weak” who always needs help."

That leads to internal tension, uncertainty, low self-esteem, and at the same time a lot of fears and anxiety. They are afraid of the new, they are afraid of failure, they are afraid of not coping, they are afraid of any changes that may be born from this fear of the future or unforeseen(which is impossible to control).

Often experience constant poisoned feeling of joy in a prosperous life, because they “don’t live their own lives,” trying to meet someone else’s expectations, to do what they should, and not what they want. When everywhere you feel you are not good enough or not entitled.

How to deal with anxiety caused by negative self-image?

1. You have to create a positive image of yourself. It's not quick and easy, but it's possible. To begin with, to assess the scale of the disaster, for several days count how many times you mentally and out loud praise yourself and how many times you scold yourself. This can be ticked in two columns according to the “scolding-praising” process.

2. If you scold yourself more often than you praise yourself, then at the end of the day before going to bed, you need to remember the past day and find at least 5 reasons to praise yourself for. For those from whom their parents expected too much (“Olympic victories” and “Nobel Prizes”), it is important to learn to see even in small actions and achievements a reason for joy and pride in oneself. Often such people habitually devalue themselves and everything that is not a “honorable diploma” (and often that too) is not noticed at all. Therefore, find something that yesterday you didn’t know how to do or didn’t try, but today you learned, decided, and did. Remember, before a man learned to walk, he fell a thousand times, but that did not stop him from getting back on his feet.

3. Stop comparing yourself to others. You will never compare to a world-class opera singer if your talent lies elsewhere. But you will get hurt forever and you will have a lifelong reason to worry. You can only compare yourself with yourself yesterday.

4. In the morning, before you get up, ask yourself: “How can I please myself today?” and try to do it.

5. Poll your friends about your strengths personal qualities that can help you cope with anxiety or fear. Ask them to name at least three.

6. Draw or describe in detail your anxiety or fear. Look at her from afar. Ask yourself questions: “When does it appear? What plans does he have for your life? What qualities of yours help her attack you? And which ones make it weaker?” Try to remember a situation when you dealt with anxiety or fear. What helped you then?

Separately, it is worth mentioning about children with borderline parents or those suffering from alcoholism or mental illness. Thus, in schizophrenia, relationships are ambivalent and often follow the “love-hate” principle.

Such people have a lot of chaos and double messages in childhood (when words contradict each other or the meaning of the spoken phrase does not agree with the non-verbal accompaniment. For example, in an angry tone they say “of course, I love you” or “I need you so much, go away!”)

To survive, such children have to cope with frequent anxiety themselves and often become a parent to their parents. They have a lot of repressed emotions and great difficulty in building close, long-term, trusting relationships. They often have unreasonable fear of the future And inability to rejoice, even if everything in their life is good at the moment.

It often seems to them that for any joy, desire or dream realized they will have to pay with suffering. The hardest thing for them is to learn to praise themselves, allow themselves to do something for themselves and dream. Inner voice parent sounds bright and strong. In these cases, there is a lot of work ahead and it is better to use the help of a specialist.

How to deal with anxiety?

Every family has its own ways of dealing with anxiety. Moreover, they can be both functional and dysfunctional. The latter includes smoking, alcohol and other types of addictions. When in fact a person avoids meeting himself and his feelings without solving the problem.

Conflict is also a dysfunctional way. It happens that the anxiety of one partner provokes the anxiety of the other and, merging, these two anxieties strengthen, prolong and reinforce each other. Some people immerse themselves in TV series, games, the Internet, and work just so as not to live real life and not have to deal with anxiety.

Along with dysfunctional ones, there are ways that not only really help you get through uncomfortable moments, but also bring benefits. These are sports, reading, creativity, communication, art and even cleaning.

  • Do what brings you joy.
  • Be in touch with yourself and your feelings.
  • Learn to comfort your inner child.
  • Imagine yourself little, take yourself in your arms and ask: “What are you afraid of, what can I do for you?”
  • Fulfill wishes from childhood (One woman with high anxiety was greatly helped by her Small child, asking to take daily walks before bed and the opportunity “like in childhood” to climb onto a snowdrift and lie in the snow; buy a beautiful dress or a talisman toy)
  • Learn to express your emotions.
  • Learn to set boundaries and protect yourself.
  • Know how to distinguish between your own and someone else’s anxiety (in codependent relationships they often merge and reinforce each other).

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Gestalt in working with anxiety and anxiety

This program is a series of group classes of 40 minutes. The group effect of classes is the opportunity for group members to receive support and feedback from peers; to see that they are not alone in their experiences - this in itself already has therapeutic effect. In addition, the issues that cause people anxiety are often similar, and by joining during individual sessions, a person who is hesitant to individual work, has the opportunity to complete his unfinished situations while remaining in the shadows.

Target: reducing the level of personal anxiety in primary and secondary school students who are prone to anxious reactions.

Tasks:

Creating conditions for group members to explore their personal boundaries;

Teaching group members how to focus on breathing;

Assisting group members in completing unfinished gestalts;

Training group members in effective interaction skills (active listening, I-statements).

Target group: Primary and secondary school students prone to anxious reactions.

Theoretical background

The subject of study in Gestalt psychology is the relationship between the organism and the environment. This is due to the fact that no individual is self-sufficient. It can only exist in an environment with which it forms a single field at every moment. The behavior of an individual is a function of this field; it is determined by the nature of the relationship between him and his environment. If the relationship is mutually satisfactory, then the individual’s behavior is considered normal. If the relationship is conflicting, then the individual's behavior is described as abnormal.

The functioning of a person in the environment occurs at the contact boundary between him and his environment. Psychological events that are the subject of research in psychology also arise there. The boundary here is understood as the point at which the separation of the Self from the non-Self occurs. Our thoughts, actions, behavior, emotions are a way of expressing and accepting events occurring on the border. The boundary within the Gestalt approach is a function of the organism/environment field. It allows the individual to alternate being in contact with separation from the environment. If the boundary between the organism and the environment becomes unclear or loses its permeability, this leads to a breakdown in contact, awareness and separation of oneself from another. The boundary between the organism and the environment must be maintained in a state of permeability for exchange to occur, and at the same time be strong enough to maintain autonomy.

An individual interacts with the environment through two systems: sensory and motor. Sensory system provides him with orientation, and motor - manipulation. To satisfy his needs, an individual must find in the environment necessary materials, and then manipulate them in such a way that the organic balance is restored, and then the gestalt is completed. This can be represented as the following diagram.

As a result of isolating a figure from the background, the mobilization of energy increases - the excitement necessary to perform a manipulation that satisfies the needs of the individual arises. Excitement is always accompanied by increased metabolism - the oxidation of accumulated food substances, and therefore there is an urgent need for large amounts of oxygen. The body reacts to this by increasing the frequency and amplitude of breathing.

If for some reason (internal or external) the manipulation cannot be performed, then the body tries to block the resulting excitation by controlling breathing. Instead of spontaneously deepening breathing - both inhalations and exhalations - the person continues to breathe as he did before arousal. Then rib cage contracts to enhance exhalation and rid the lungs of carbon dioxide (an oxidation product). Along with involuntary chest compressions, anxiety arises. It occurs in all cases when the body lacks oxygen.

So, anxiety, from the point of view of the Gestalt approach, - this is the experience of difficulty breathing during blocked arousal.

At the moment when an individual tries to block the resulting excitation through breathing control, the function of the contact boundary is disrupted. It loses its permeability, which prevents the satisfaction of needs and the completion of the gestalt.

If an individual often uses this method of interrupting contact with the environment, then anxiety accumulates and becomes undifferentiated. A personality trait such as anxiety develops. Within the framework of the Gestalt approach anxiety understood as an individual's tendency to react with anxiety.

Based on the foregoing, work with anxiety includes three areas:

I. Training in the skills of focusing on one’s own breathing (helps to explore how the individual stops full exhalation through various patterns of muscle tension).

II. Exploration of personal boundaries (helps restore the ability to contact the environment).

III. Translating anxiety into arousal and finding ways to satisfy the needs that caused this arousal that are safe for other body functions (helps complete unfinished gestalts).

LESSON 1

Goal: To introduce group members to the goals of group work and to each other.

Materials: forms for the exercise “My personal coat of arms” (see Appendix 1), feedback sheets (see Appendix 2).

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Exercise “Snowball”.

2. Exercise “Pairs”. In pairs, talk about yourself for a minute, and then in a circle talk about your partner in the first person.

3. Exercise “My personal coat of arms.” Participants draw their coat of arms on pre-prepared forms, then the coats of arms are hung out and participants get acquainted with them for 5 minutes.

4. The facilitator explains the goals and mode of operation of the group.

5. Sharing or written feedback.

LESSON 2

Goal: creating an atmosphere of safety in the group.

Materials: Whatman paper, markers, newspaper, feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Brainstorm Expectations/Agreements. On whatman paper, first expectations are written down with colored markers, then agreements or rules for the group’s work.

3. Exercise “All aboard.” The entire group should fit on a piece of newspaper and stand for 5 seconds without touching the floor.

Or the “Knots” exercise. Group members stand in a circle, extend their hands to the center and join hands, forming a closed chain; then they must unravel in a circle without opening their hands.

4. Sharing (emotional exchange).

5. Written feedback.

LESSON 3

Goal: learning the skills of focusing on breathing.

Materials: gymnastic mats, feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Exercise “Awareness of Breathing.” Participants are asked to lie down or sit comfortably, close their eyes and pay attention to their breathing for 5–7 minutes, alternately focusing on inhalation, exhalation, muscle sensations, and breathing patterns. (For details see: F. Perls. Gestalt therapy practice. p.156.)

4. Individual session. One of the group members is asked to analyze and comprehend the experience gained during the exercise.

5. Written feedback.

LESSON 4

Purpose: study of the contact boundary.

Materials: A3 sheets, colored pencils, feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Exercise “My World”. Participants are invited to draw on A3 sheets of paper the world that exists around them, leaving in the center empty place the size of a palm. Then they need to draw a picture of themselves and how they interact with the world in the center.

3. Sharing (emotional exchange).

5. Written feedback.

LESSON 5

Goal: creating conditions for group members to gain positive contact experience.

Materials: feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Exercise “Magic palms”. Slap each other in pairs, taking turns over the entire surface of the body for 15 minutes.

3. Sharing (emotional exchange).

4. Individual session (based on the results of the exercise).

5. Written feedback.

LESSON 6

Materials: Whatman paper, markers, handouts on the topic “I-statement”, feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Theoretical block “I-statement” (see Appendix 3).

3. “I-statement” - practical part (see Appendix 4).

4. Written feedback.

LESSON 7

Goal: training in skills of effective interaction at the border of contact.

Materials: Whatman paper, markers, handouts on the topic “Active listening”, feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Theoretical block “Active listening” (see Appendix 5).

3. “Active listening” - practical part (see Appendix 6).

4. Written feedback.

LESSON 8–14

Goal: creating conditions for group members to transform their anxiety into excitement and safely satisfy the needs that caused this excitement (creating conditions for completing unfinished gestalts).

Materials: feedback sheets.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Individual session. One of the group members is asked to work through a situation that is causing him anxiety or concern.

3. Sharing (emotional exchange).

4. Written feedback.

LESSON 15

Purpose: summing up, completing group work.

Materials: brushes for “hugging” or candles and foil according to the number of participants.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

1. Sharing (who came with what).

2. Summing up the results of group work: analysis of expectations, sharing.

3. Exercise “Hugging”. Participants are given brushes different colors, they freely approach each other, thank them for their work, say warm farewell words and tie a few threads from their tassel onto their partner’s thread. At the end of the exercise, instead of tassels, each participant gets a multi-colored necklace.

Or the “Candles” exercise. Participants light candles, approach each other in a free manner, say goodbye and drip wax onto their palm covered with foil.

ANNEX 1

My personal coat of arms

Name_______________________

APPENDIX 2

Feedback sheet

Date____________________ Name _________________

very bad 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 very good

3. What did you like about today’s lesson?

4. What didn’t you like in class today?
_________________________________________________________________

5. What was useful to you in class today?
_________________________________________________________________

6. Wishes and suggestions to the psychologist for conducting classes
_________________________________________________________________

APPLICATION 3

Self-statement theory

"I-statement" is safe way expressing to another person your feelings, what you feel and how you see your relationship in the future. In an I-statement, the speaker expresses his feelings without offending the listener. The “I-statement” is constructed as follows:

I feel... when someone (you)... because... . So next time I want... .

1. I get angry when someone takes my things without permission because I might need them myself. So next time I want you to ask me if you can take some of my things.

2. I feel abandoned when you go out with other guys and don’t invite me with you, because I think that friends should always be together. So next time, invite me with you.

3. I was very angry when I found out that a friend spoke badly about me behind my back because it was dishonest. So the next time you don't like something about me, tell me directly.

Rules for constructing an “I-statement”

I feel...

Use words that accurately describe your feelings.

Don't exaggerate feelings.

Don't use "sacrificial" words.

When someone...

Describe behavior accurately (behavior is what is seen and heard, not what you think it is).

Don't use hurtful words.

Because (I)...

Be as specific as possible.

Focus on how it affects you.

Do not exaggerate the effect, as this may cause a defensive or skeptical reaction.

Don't use words that sound good but are not true.

Next time I'd like...

Be direct about your desires.

Be logical and correct.

APPLICATION 4

Practice “I-statements”

Practice making statements in the form of “I statements” using the following situations:

1. During recess, you and your friend play catch. Suddenly a guy passing by takes it away.

I feel ____________________________________________________

When someone ___________________________________________________

Because ____________________________________________________

So next time I want ___________________________
________________________________________________________________

2. You stood in line in the cafeteria for a long time, when suddenly two boys ran up and got in ahead of you.


_________________________________________________________________

3. You were given a new toy for your birthday. When you came home after school, you saw that your sister had thrown it into the ditch in front of the house and now it was all dirty and scratched.

I feel _____________________________________________________

When someone _____________________________________________________

Because _____________________________________________________

So next time I want ____________________________
_________________________________________________________________

4. You are sitting at your desk, and suddenly a classmate passing by calls you names.

I feel _____________________________________________________

When someone _____________________________________________________

Because _____________________________________________________

So next time I want ____________________________
_________________________________________________________________

5. You're eating lunch in the cafeteria, and suddenly someone comes and takes your cookies.

I feel _____________________________________________________

When someone _____________________________________________________

Because _____________________________________________________

So next time I want ____________________________
_________________________________________________________________

APPLICATION 5

Active listening theory

1. Brainstorm “Traits of a Good Listener.”
2. Brainstorm “Traits of a Bad Listener.”
3. Active listening technique:

Action Goals How to do it Example
Support Show interest
Help the other person continue talking
Refrain from expressing agreement or disagreement
Use neutral words
Use calm ones
intonation
Use non-verbal communication
“Could you tell me more about this?”
Clarification Clearer understanding of what is going on
Get more information
Help the speaker see other points of view
Ask questions "When did it happen?"
Expression
understanding the idea
Show that you are listening to what is being said to you
Show how accurately you understand the main thoughts of your interlocutor
Highlight main ideas and facts
Paraphrase your interlocutor
“So you want her to not let you down anymore?”
Expression
understanding feelings
Show that you understand how the person is feeling
Give a person the opportunity to reevaluate his feelings after he hears them from another
Highlight the speaker's main feelings
Paraphrase your interlocutor
“I think this really upsets you.”
Generalization Collect together all the main ideas, thoughts, feelings
Create a basis for further conversation
Repeat main ideas and feelings “In my opinion, the main thing that I heard was...”
Conclusion Show respect for your interlocutor Show respect for the other person's feelings and thoughts “I really appreciate your desire to resolve this issue.”

APPLICATION 6

Practice active listening

1. Divide participants into pairs.

2. Ask one of the couple to talk about something important to him, and the second - deliberately not listen to him.

3. Swap their roles.

4. Discuss how they felt when they were ignored.

5. Repeat the exercise, but ask participants to listen to their interlocutors using the active listening technique.

6. Discuss how they felt when they were listened to.

7. Ask students what they learned and how it can be used in everyday life.

LIST OF REFERENCES USED

1. Perls F., Goodman P. The theory of Gestalt therapy. - M.: Institute of General Humanitarian Research, 2005.

2. Perls F. Gestalt therapy practice. - M.: Institute of General Humanitarian Research, 2005.

3. Polster I., Polster M. Integrated Gestalt Therapy: Contours of Theory and Practice. - M.: Independent company “Class”, 2004.

4. Yontef G. Awareness, dialogue and process in therapy. Toolkit for seminars ed. D. Khlomova. - M.: Publication of the Moscow Gestalt Institute, 2004.

5. Robin J.-M. Gestalt therapy. Methodological manual for seminars / Ed. D. Khlomova. - M.: Publication of the Moscow Gestalt Institute, 2004.

6. 21 lessons about leadership. - Kemerovo: ALE, 1996.

6. Lebedeva N., Ivanova E. Journey to Gestalt: theory and practice. - St. Petersburg: Rech, 2005.



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